Degenerate Friday! NFL Draft Round 1

Quick Thoughts on Round 1 of the NFL Draft……and while writing that sentence the Brewers just scored 3 more times on the Pirates. Seriously? They swept the Pirates by an aggregate score of 36-1. My brother and I debated what was more embarrassing – the offense or the pitching? I think it’s a close call and either way means that despite the Pirates 7-6 start, they are still the Pirates. Since Friday’s are our gambling day, I’ll bet on Tebow being the guy to help Josh McDaniels pack on his way out of Denver.

- Josh McDaniels has some huge cahones. Either that or he’s an idiot. I’m leaning towards the latter. Tim Tebow in the first round? At #25? Trading all over the place and then taking him ahead of Jimmy Clausen and Colt McCoy? Overall there is a ton of hate for Tebow as a person and a football player. I think he’s actually just a nerd. He works hard, stays out of trouble and is as smart as you can be when you’re from Florida (the bar is very low), but he just comes across as cheesey. My wife watched his interview and offered this analysis: “I’m pretty sure he’s a virgin. He just looks and acts like a guy that’s never been laid.” I guess she’s not a fan. I thought the best comment on him came from Tom Jackson when he stated flatly “You can only be a leader if you’re PLAYING. And he will not be playing.” Very well said. I don’t get it because I’m not sure how anyone figures Tebow is going to a better pro than Jimmy Clausen, Colt McCoy or Dan Lefe…something from Western Michigan. Coach McDaniels, I hope you have a moving company on speed dial because drafting the second-best wide receiver (Demaryus Thomas over Dez Bryant) and the 4th or 5th best quarterback both in the first round put you squarely in the cross-hairs.

- I really, really despise the showing of the phone calls to the players before the draft pick was made. Talk about ruining any and all suspense in the process. Why would they allow the player to take the call and then show it on television so everyone knows before the Commissioner makes the announcement?

- Did anyone else notice that Steve Young does not appear to be very liked on the ESPN set? There seemed to be numerous occassions where Young would interrupt the others to get his opinion interjected, and numerous other times when the guys like Gruden, Jackson and Boomer would just talk right over the top of Young and take veiled shots at him like “did you see this, Steve?” before disproving his opinions. It just seemed mildly tense any time he would open his mouth and his thoughts were not appreciated by the others. Yet I still like Young because knowing that he went to BYU, I just assume his personal life is just like Big Love.

- The Coors Light Home Draft commercials? Awesome. The concept is great, not exactly new, but great. They are equivalent to the Heineken mini kegs, and let’s face it, the mini keg is a much cooler looking than the Coors offering. But the commercials with Ditka? Priceless. I would say that the commercial was about as impressive as what Detroit has done to remake the Lions and be in a better position to compete than the Chicago Bears.

- Loved the Packers pick of Brian Bulaga, and as has been pointed out quite a bit, he has the look of a Packers linemen if ever there was one. Between him and Mark Tauscher, you have two Big Ten brawlers who look like they belong playing for Green Bay. Like I said yesterday, they needed to fortify the line because if they give Rodgers time, he will have an MVP season. Let’s just hope the guy is better than the last highly touted Iowa lineman, Robert Gallery.

- The Cowboys may have made the best pick of the first round, getting Dez Bryant who had fallen all the way towards the end of the round. Bryant has Moss/T.O. talent and has taken a beating for being kind of a knucklehead. The key will be whether he takes the draft slide as a personal slight and uses it as motivation to drive himself to get back at all of the teams that passed on him. If he does that, a tandem of Miles Austin and Dez Bryant (with Roy Williams underneath) will immediately improve Tony Romo and the Cowboys offense.

Weekend Hangover - Love/Hate: Oscars!!

LOVE

- I think I can smell the desperation from the Bears all the way out in New York. The Bears stole all of the headlines at the opening of the free agency period by throwing money around like they were trying to make Avatar. And as we saw how that worked out last night during the Oscars…….the big winner was the low budget Hurt Locker. What did the Bears actually get for all that money? A defensive lineman that has never played hard consistently and does not play hard when he isn’t playing for a new contract? Check – Julius Peppers. A backup running back that has only been a starter for 1 year even though he’s 31 years old to compete with a guy who has rushed for over 2,100 yards in his first two seasons? Check – Chester Taylor. A tight end that hasn’t been relevant since 2003 to compete with one of the better tight ends in the league? Check – Brandon Manumaleuna. (I don’t care if that’s spelled wrong – I’m not looking it up, and I’m not typing it again) Wait – I just looked up his stats and he has NEVER been relevant. His career year was 2003 (great guess by me) when he had 29 catches for 238 yards. And the Bears are excited about this guy?!?!

None of those moves address the Bears problems which include offensive line, wide receiver, defensive backs, linebackers, a QB who might be color-blind, a clueless coaching staff, and the fact that they are the Bears. I think the Bears might be worse than the Lions next season.

- The Wisconsin Badger basketball team continues to roll, and is now well positioned for at worst a #4 seed in the NCAA tournament. They head into the Big Ten tournament next weekend with confidence and after they put the Illinois tournament hopes on life support, they have a chance to pull the plug completely on Friday in the Big Ten tourney. Interesting that according to this site, the Badgers, as the #4 seed in the tournament has better odds to win the conference tournament than Michigan State, the #3 seed. Considering Wisconsin would likely get Ohio State, and Michigan State would likely get Purdue in the semifinals, I can’t say I agree with those odds.

- Loved watching Alec Baldwin & Steve Martin hosting the Oscards. They were the perfect tandem in that the lines are always stiff and awkward during the awards shows, and the two of them excel at sarcasm, and acting awkward. Question about Baldwin – was he actually appreciated before 30 Rock? I mean, he was phenomenal in old movies like Glengarry Glen Ross, The Hunt For Red October and Beetlejuice among others. Yet, it doesn’t seem like he wasn’t nearly as famous until the past few years.

- Another quick note on the Oscars – it was great to see Jeff Bridges win an Oscar. I don’t know much about him, but he just seems to be a fairly down-to-earth kind of guy and a hard-working actor. Maybe I just project his character in The Big Lebowski on him, but either way, I like the guy. I actually think that his best work was in Arlington Road – a great, great movie that is not widely known. Put it on your Netflix – you will not be disappointed. It’s also worth pointing out that his movie credits also include Tron – an 80’s icon movie. Awesome.

HATE

- Does anyone want the 4th #1 seed? Duke lost to Maryland last Sunday, and then Kansas State lost to Iowa State this weekend. Has Purdue stabilized enough to get the spot? Does Duke still get it due to their wins over top RPI teams? Was Kansas State coach Frank Martin more focused on his contract extension (announced Sunday) than on Iowa State? Isn’t it annoying when I keep asking questions? Anyway, I still think Ohio State can get the top seed if they win out the Big Ten tourney. Seems like the other 3 top seeds are more of a lock than Sandra Bullock was to win her Oscar last night.

- While I am already sick of the Clash of the Titans movie promos, for this year’s NCAA tournament, you will notice a lack of “titans” in the brackets. UNC is having one of the worst seasons they have ever had, UConn will be in the NIT tournament, and Arizona has been awful in the worst of the big conferences. It’s kind of like an Oscars ceremony without Meryl Streep being nominated. She has been nominated like 16 times and only has 1 win.

- RIP Arizona Cardinals chances of making the playoffs next season. Once Kurt Warner retired, did the team throw in the towel in free agency? They lost their best linebacker (Carlos Dansbury) to the Dolphins, their best safety (Antrelle Rolle) to the Giants and traded away their second-best receiver (Anquan Boldin) for a warm beer. Was that really the best deal they could get for Boldin? They gave up Boldin & a 5th round pick for a 3rd and 4th round pick. Seems like a bargain price for a guy who has 5 seasons with over 1,000 yards in 7 years. Though he has only played a full 16 game season twice.

- I will mostly reserve judgement on Ben Roethlisberger until the legal process runs its course. Yet, no matter what the legal result is, he’s guilty of poor decision making. Ben is 28 years old, so why was he at a college bar doing whatever he was doing with a 20 year old? And this is now the second accusation in 2 years against him (though no chargers were ever filed in the first case – there is a civil case), which makes you wonder – why is he always in the wrong place at the wrong time? At some point, its no longer a coincidence that bad things happen to you if you keep putting yourself in bad situations. On the flip side, if you put yourself in better situations, you can have more success. Kind of like that Giuliana Rancic that went from being a random E! reporter to suddenly having her own reality show with her husband – who won the first apprentice show.

- If the Nets are able to avoid setting the record for the worst record in the history of the NBA, they may have the Knicks to thank. They have beaten the Knicks for 2 of their 7 wins on the season, and on Saturday night, New York went out and and missed all 18 of their three-point attempts in the loss. It is just another chapter in ineptitude for the Knicks and another reason that LeBron James will not sign there this summer. That was a serious Toilet Bowl at Madison Square Garden on Saturday night.

Week 9 Hangover - Love/Hate

LOVE

- Thankfully we no longer have to worry about Iowa crashing the BCS championship. Losing to Northwestern? Ouch. While I don’t believe Ricky Stanzi is a great quarterback by any stretch, the guy is a gamer, and it’s obvious that the team is not the same without him. After he left the game with an ankle injury, the Hawkeyes had no chance. And yet they still can play their way to the Rose Bowl (where they will get demoralized by Oregon) by beating Ohio State.

- Congrats, Mr. & Mrs. Squirrel on a great wedding this past weekend. Great to catch up with everyone. And it was a classic Midwest wedding in that there was a mullet sighting, at least one guy wearing a short-sleeved shirt with a tie, and a few people that were as wide as they were tall (and at least a few of them were cops, so I should probably leave it at that). Oh, and of course, a polka.

- The Bengals are a virtual lock to make the playoffs and are potentially a threat to win the AFC. They’ve now swept the Ravens are 4-0 within the AFC North, which many thought was the best division in football. They pounded the Ravens with their running game, as Cedric Benson went over 100 yards against the supposedly tough and angry Ravens defense for the second time this season.

- As strange as it sounds, the Titans appear to be much better with Vince Young at QB. It’s not that he’s putting up magical yardage numbers, but the team is responding with him under center. He has a passer rating of 83 and is averaging less than 150 yards in his starts, but he ran for a TD as the Titans won their second consecutive game. Now here’s where it gets interesting for the owner, Bud Adams. If the team continues to win with Young, is Jeff Fisher more or less on the hot seat? He was the coach who went with Kerry Collins to start the season, and he was the coach who was reluctant to go to Young until the owner demanded that the former #3 pick get some playing time. Now that they are winning, his record looks better, but his error of not starting Young from the beginning looks more and more glaring.

- The Brewers traded JJ Hardy to the Minnesota Twins for young CF Carlos Gomez over the weekend. The move frees up Alcides Escobar to be the starting shortstop, and guarantees the team will not be resigning Mike Cameron, which frees up a considerable amount of payroll. If that money is used for much-needed starting pitching, I think it could be a great trade for the Brewers. They were not going to get much value for a .229 hitting SS that everyone knew the Brewers no longer wanted. And Gomez is a young player with vast potential, as he was one of the key cogs in the trade that sent Johan Santana to the Mets a few years ago. This gives the Brewers the potential to have an extremely fast and athletic line up with Escobar, Gomez and Ricky Weeks all able to put pressure on opposing teams with their running game. The real question is whether Ken Macha will utilize that speed or if he will continue to try and rely on the HR as the sole source of offense.

HATE

- Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome your 2010 coach of the Green Bay Packers, Jon Gruden!!! There needs to be wholesale changes in Green Bay after this season. Ted Thompson and Mike McCarthy need to go. And the special teams coach should have been left in Tampa Bay to find his own way home. The team has talented players at the skill positions, but the game plan is about as exciting as watching Lauren Conrad on the Hills – nothing ever happens, and there is no creativity or excitement. The offensive line is worse than an average big ten team, but they don’t do anything to help Rodgers get rid of the ball faster – roll him out, stick with a 3 step drop, draw plays, etc. Tampa Bay sacked Rodgers 6 times and had 3 interceptions. This was a complete abomination and embarrassment, and a reason for a complete overhaul.

- How is that Jay Cutler experience working out in Chicago? About as well as Katherine Heigl’s movie career. The Bears were blown out by the Cardinals yesterday, and while Cutler hasn’t been the biggest problem, the team is in trouble. Has the team quit on Lovie Smith? Time for Chicago fans to start thinking about whether Luol Deng and the Bulls. Then the Bulls will fall out of contention by April, and false hope for the Cubs can begin again. The cycle continues……

- Does Mike Singletary’s “Mr. Furious” routine have an expiration date? Are we past it? It seems possible that he had his team too high to start the season and the team has regressed and went from 3-1 to 4-5. And Alex Smith definitely has not revived his career based on this week’s 3 INT performance.

- Not sure what to even say about this video from a women’s college soccer game. This is the dirtiest, most ruthless thing I’ve seen in a really long time. She should have been thrown out of the game at least 4-5 times.

Why It Must Suck To Be A Bears Fan

It is not debatable that it sucks to be a Bears fan. It is only debatable WHY it sucks to be a Bears fan. The football team in the city of broad shoulders has not excelled at the sport where broad shoulders should come in extremely useful.

So this is why it sucks to be a Bears fan…….

I. The Fan Base

First and foremost, it sucks to be a Bears fan because you are lumped together with the overweight, sausage-eating, baker’s-dozen-heart-attack-having, Ditka-loving group from Saturday Night Live. Talking about da bears and dem guys dat can’t win dat game against dat udder team. It’s not a pretty sight to see the passionate fans of Chicago watching their team come up short time and time again. And the fans are passionate, because let’s be honest, what else do they have to cheer for? The Cubs? Yeah, that “curse” from 1908 isn’t going to end anytime soon for the loveable losers that fill the stands with people who don’t know anything about baseball, but know that they want to be seen at the game. Oh, and they just declared bankruptcy, so do you really expect them to improve any time soon? No. The Bulls? Ever since Jerry Krause ran Jordan out of town, the team has been a laughing stock. Oh, and that was more than 10 years ago the last time the Bulls were relevant. The White Sox? Please. There are only a dozen people that know the White Sox play in Chicago and 2 of them are still on probation from their booze-fueled attack on the Royals first base coach a few seasons ago. The Blackhawks? They have a great, rich tradition of success, but no one outside of Canada cares about a sport where they call the jerseys “sweaters.” So the fans in Chicago have no choice but to have blind faith and hope for the Bears success.

II. The Ownership/Management

The McCaskey family controls about 80% of the team, and I don’t think you can question their passion for the team and for football. Unfortunately, the problem has been with hiring poor personnel people and messing up the roster. The McCaskeys hired Jerry Angelo as the GM in 2001, yet their coach at the time, Dick Jauron, had in his contract that he would get final personnel power, so their GM essentially had no authority. That’s like having Barney Fife as your town sherriff and replacing him with Aunt Bea!! Amazingly, that didn’t work out well, and Jauron was eventually fired in 2003. The personnel decisions from Angelo have been horrendous. Free agency and trades haven’t treated the Bears well, bringing in Brian Griese, giving up a draft pick for John Tait, and giving away Thomas Jones. The same Thomas Jones who led the AFC in rushing last year, and is 5th this year. And it’s not pretty looking at the first round picks since 2001: David Terrell, Marc Columbo, Rex Grossman, Michael Haynes, Tommie Harris, Cedric Benson, Greg Olsen and Chris Williams. He gave up Thomas Jones to give the job to Cedric Benson who was eventually cut before resurfacing with the Bengals, and is now 3rd in the league in rushing. Is there such thing as a Reverse King Midas? Jerry Angelo might be King Turd – everything he touches turns to a turd until they are out from under the Bears’ grip. Oh, and then there’s Kyle Orton……..

III. The Quarterback

Speaking of Kyle Orton, it deserves its own section. The Quarterback of the Chicago Bears, it doesn’t sound that complicated. Play caretaker for a team with a good defense and a predisposition to run the ball. Yet the Bears have not found a quarterback since Sid Luckman – and he retired in 1950. Yes, Jim McMahon won a Super Bowl in 1986, but he was not the key to that team like Walter Payton and the defense were. Fans want to have a quarterback to see as the face of the franchise. Bears fans have had the following guys as their quarterbacks: Mike Tomczak, Jim Harbaugh, Peter Tom Willis, Eric Kramer, Steve Walsh, Dave Krieg, Rick Mirer, Shane Matthews, Cade McNown, Jim Miller, Chris Chandler, Henry Burris, Kordell Stewart, Rex Grossman, Kyle Orton, Brian Griese, and finally Jay Cutler. I’ll take “Quarterbacks I will always bet against and will win much more than I will lose” for a million, Alex. The Bears threw in Kyle Orton along with first round draft picks to get Jay Cutler, and all Orton has done is lead the Broncos to a perfect 6-0 start with a passer rating over 100, good for 8th in the league.

I mean, Jay Cutler just signed a two-year contract extension yesterday. That’s a sign of how bad it’s been for the Bears quarterbacks. Five games, 10 TDs, 7 INTs and a rating under 87.0, and yet that is far and away better than anything they’ve seen before, so they wanted to lock him up as soon as possible. Your kid only got in a fender-bender during his first 5 weeks with his license and didn’t total the car, so you might as well upgrade him to a Bentley.

IV. Lack of Success

And finally, the biggest reason it sucks to be a Bears fan is that the Bears suck. They won the Super Bowl in 1986 (after the 1985 season), and since then, made one flukey trip in 2006, where they were demolished by the Colts. The Bears fans still rely upon that 1985/6 team for an identity, and idolized Coach Ditka, Walter Payton, Mike Singletary, and Richard Dent so much that they have failed to realize how poor the team has been in the past 20+ years. Oh, and Ditka is from Pennsylvania, not Chicago. The Bears are 5-9 in the playoffs since winning that lone Super Bowl, and have only won their division 3 times since 1991. The Monsters of the Midway are about as intimidating as the Baby Muppets. Even Paris Hilton realized that the Bears suck, and dumped Brian Urlacher because she couldn’t date someone that was more overrated than her.