Weekend Hangover - Love/Hate

LOVE

- Congrats to Michigan for winning a huge game this weekend which should launch them……INTO the rankings? Seriously, we’re supposed to be impressed by a victory against a team that was barely .500 last year and lost their starting quarterback for much of the game? I don’t buy it. Yes, Denard Robinson has put up monster stats the first two games…against Connecticut and Notre Dame. Call me when he does something against a real team.

- I love the return of football season, but let’s not overreact too much too early in the season. The sky is not falling in Indianapolis, Arian Foster will not rush for 3,000 yards this season and the Seahawks will not go undefeated.

- So much for Boise State’s chances of making the BCS Championship. When you’re only marquee win is against a Virginia Tech team that then loses to James Madison (who knew they even fielded a football team?), you can forget playing for a national championship. That would be like Jessica Alba trying to claim she should get a lifetime achievement for acting award with her highlight being Into The Blue.

- Everyone knows I hate everything Philly. Watching the Packers beat the Eagles brings me an inordinate amount of joy. And while it is a big road win to start the season in Green Bay, there are definitely some major concerns, particularly on defense. Dom Capers defense seems to be completely boom or bust. They blitz and take chances and if they don’t get a sack or an interception, they give up a ton of wide open pass plays and gashing runs. Perhaps Andy Reid’s sugar rush wore out by the end of the game, but he made some really questionable decisions down the stretch. Using his timeouts with more than 5 minutes remaining left the Eagles without a way to stop the clock after the 2 minute warning. And then on the critical 4^th and 1 play, with the Packers struggling to keep up with Michael Vick, Reid chose to take the fastest guy on the field and run him straight ahead like a fullback rather than stretch the field and let him use his speed. At least now we’ll get to watch the Eagles idiot fans whine about a quarterback controversy all season.

HATE

- Can the media – particularly BSPN – finally stop trying to sell us the hype on Miami quarterback JaCorey Harris? Much like the success of Glee, I just don’t understand the fascination with a show about the glee club or the fascination with a quarterback who can’t throw. He is a great athlete but a terrible quarterback. He was exposed against Wisconsin in the bowl game last season, so what made anyone think he would excel against an Ohio State team that was better than the Badgers and returned most of their starters? Harris threw 4 interceptions against the Buckeyes, ensuring an easy win for Ohio State. Looks like a reincarnation of Isiah “Juice” Williams at Illinois. Who? Exactly – another overhyped nobody quarterback.

While BSPN was hyping this as “Monster Saturday” they would have been more accurate to call it “Exposing the State of Florida” weekend – Miami and Florida State got hammered in so-called marquee games and the Florida Gators continued to show they have a long way to go to get past the ghost of Tim Tebow.

- Went to the US Open on Saturday with tickets to the women’s final. It’s a great atmosphere and we got there early and had drinks out in the gallery watching the end of the Roger Federer match on the multiple big screens available. Then we settled into our seats and watched Kim Clijsters absolutely destroy her Russian opponent, 6-2 6-1 in exactly one hour. As if I wasn’t disappointed enough that neither Venus Williams nor Caroline Wozniacki were in the finals, but then the match was a complete blow out. Imagine how annoyed I would have been if I actually had to pay for the tickets.

- The Wisconsin Badgers have enough talent to win the Big Ten this year, but they seem to be plagued with the same thing that has been a staple of too many Bret Bielema teams – they are undisciplined. They are careless with the football and make stupid plays which allow inferior opponents to stay in the game. Opening weekend against UNLV they gave up more points than yards in the first half (14 points and 12 yards), and this week against a pathetic San Jose State team, the continued to turn the ball over with a chance to put the game away before halftime. The Badgers have an awesome trio of tailbacks, a dynamic tight end, and an emerging receiving corps, yet if they play this way against a respectable opponent, they will get blown out.

- Even if the call at the end of the Lions-Bears game was correctly interpreted, it sucks. Calvin Johnson caught the winning touchdown in the final seconds but the ball came loose as he was bouncing up to celebrate. It’s a shame because the Lions played well enough to win even after franchise QB Matt Stafford was injured.

I'm Back! NFL 2010 Preview MegaPost

Well, I guess I’m like Brett Favre and herpes….you just can’t get rid of me. It’s been ages, but with football season about to kick off it’s time to get back at it and posting regularly. This whole blog started last year with a season preview, so it’s only fitting to get back to work with a season preview/prediction column and wrap in a Degenerate Friday Week 1 picks. And while it is easy on the eyes to watch Caroline Wozniacki play in the U.S. Open, it’s football that really gets us fired up. On a side note – I’m hoping Wozniacki makes the finals because I’ll be there Saturday night. Let’s get right to it…..no gimmicks, no categories, just a full break down of how I see the NFL season playing out.

I break down the season slightly different than most people – most analysts go through and pick their Super Bowl teams and then back their way into records for every team. I go through the entire league schedule and pick every game, then totaling up what records the teams will end up having. The good part is that it doesn’t fall prey to preconceived notions and it definitely allows a tough schedule to have an effect on a team’s final record. The down side is that I end up with some surprises that I may not have made otherwise, as you’ll see with this year’s AFC playoff teams. And I still ended up with 2 new playoff teams in each conference, which is close to the typical 5 teams that surprise people.

Breaking it down by division then a playoff prediction, starting in the NFC

NFC East

Dallas (10-6)

The Cowboys have talked themselves into believing they are a Super Bowl favorite despite bringin

g back most of the team that got drubbed by the Vikings in last year’s playoffs. I expect Marion Barber to have a big season – did you know the guy played last year with a hole in his quad muscle? Think about that – a freaking HOLE in his quad!! Now that he’s healthy, he’s a battering ram that will open up the field for Miles Austin to go deep and Dez Bryant to be a monster. Their offense will be as good as any in the league and their attacking defense will be enough to carry them to the division crown.

NY Giants (9-7)

I don’t actually think the Giants are that good. Yet their schedule falls pretty nicely for them and I think they have enough pieces to be in the mix. Nobody likes Eli Manning, but the guy threw for over 4,000 yards last year and obviously has the support of his team. The NFC East is a lot like the Kardashians in that everyone thinks they’re famous and are a big deal, but stop and think about it for a minute. Kim has some incredible assets (like the Cowboys) and the rest of the family is only famous by association. By association, I guess that makes the Giants equal to Courtney, the next best in the family. And now it’s time to get to the ugly family members…..

Philadelphia (7-9)

So the equation that irrational Eagles fans are selling is Andy Reid equals a winning record. Well when you subtract McNabb and Westbrook and defensive coordinator Jim Johnson, and add in a first year starter in Kevin Kolb, it changes things considerably. Kolb may turn out to be a very good quarterback, but even Aaron Rodgers struggled in his first year as a starter. I personally think Kolb does not have the dynamic fire needed to be a premiere quarterback in the league, but he does have enough physical skills to ensure the Eagles stay close.

Washington (6-10)

I saw that the Sports Guy picked the Skins as his sleeper team and has them in the playoffs. I’d like to see that just to stick it to the Eagles and their ridiculous fans. McNabb still has gas in the tank and will definitely be motivated, but he has no one to throw the ball to and the Skins are dealing with the pain in the ass that is Albert Haynesworth. New Sheriff Shanahan will eventually lead them to success, but it won’t be this year.

NFC South

New Orleans (11-5)

The Saints offense is still as dangerous as Dan Hampton on an open microphone. (The former Bear Hampton is the one that said the Vikings should hit New Orleans “like Katrina” and that the Cowboys were “brokeback cowboys” in one show – that’s a helluva performance right up there with Mel Gibson) They have a premiere quarterback, premiere coach, attacking defense and adaptable receiving and running threats. That’s enough to be there deep in the playoffs.

Atlanta (11-5)

I thought the Falcons would break out last year and they got bit by the injury bug slowing their quarterback, running back and slot receiver. This year with a healthy Matt Ryan, Michael Turner and Harry Douglas, the Falcons look poised to challenge for the division title. The Falcons could be that team to makes the leap to elite and makes a deep run in the playoffs.

Carolina (8-8)

Their biggest improvement was the removal of the Human Turnover Machine, Jake Delhomme as their starting quarterback. However, Matt Moore will struggle now that teams can scheme to stop him. They also lost Julius Peppers and Steve Smith hasn’t played since breaking his arm. Oh, and don’t forget they have a lame duck coach that will be moving on after the season and despite the running tandem of DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart, this smells like a .500 team.

Tampa Bay (2-14)

The Bucs have some nice pieces in place for future success, but the immediate future looks painful.

NFC West

San Francisco (9-7)

They are the tallest midget. The NFC West is hideous, and the Niners could run away with the division by barely being over .500. They have the defense that is the fiery design of Mike Singletary and offensive weapons in Frank Gore, Vernon Davis and Michael Crabree. If Alex Smith can effectively use his VD and Crabs, it will open things up for Gore and a successful season.

Arizona (8-8)

This text from my brother in Phoenix pretty much summed it up in the desert: “So do I really have to get behind Derek Anderson this season? But I guess it’s better than Leinart.” Anderson has a strong arm which could be beneficial to Larry Fitzgerald, but he has problems telling the difference between his receivers and defensive backs. Having 4 cupcake games against Seattle and St. Louis allows them to stay in the hunt, but Cardinal fans should start preparing for the Max Hall era which may start after a 1-4 start and a bye week.

Seattle (4-12)

Pete Carroll was able to get out of Southern Cal before the shit hit the fan, but he managed to jump right int

o another steaming pile when he went north up the coast. He has almost completely turned over the roster which would be a good thing since the Seahawks were bad, but then when you factor in Carroll’s lack of success in past NFL stints and the overall lack of success of college coaches in the pros, it is a pretty scary proposition.

St. Louis (2-14)

Well, it does appear that Sam Bradford has many of the intangibles and that can help someday return the Rams to respectability. Unfortunately that someday is not this year. Strap on that helmet tight, Sam and live to fight another season.

NFC North

Green Bay (11-5)

The Packers have the favorite for league MVP at quarterback have a healthier offensive line to give him more

time to use his considerable arsenal of Greg Jennings, Donald Driver, Jermichael Finley and James Jones. The secondary will be tested early without Al Harris and Atari Bigby but they get a scheduling break playing poor or less established passing games early in the year – Philly, Buffalo, Chicago, Detroit, Washington and Miami. That could allow the Packers to get off to a very fast start and could carry them to the division title and home field advantage throughout the playoffs.

Minnesota (9-7)

The Vikings are dealing with plenty of questions after a very successful previous season. Can

Favre hold up? Who is going to be their receiving threat? Is their defense too old? Will the rest of the team resent the special treatment that Diva Favre has gotten? Does anyone like Coach Childress?

Hard to imagine a team going to the Super Bowl when the quarterback hates the coach and the rest of the team doesn’t like either one of them.

Detroit (5-11)

Like Blake Lively, the Lions are bursting with young assets. With the addition of Suh and VandeBosch on the defensive line, the Lions could slow a few offenses, which will give Matthew Stafford, Calvin Johnson and Jahvid Best the opportunity to outscore some teams. While 5-11 doesn’t seem like a big jump, when you’re in Detroit, it’s reason to celebrate.

Chicago (5-11)

Coach on the hot seat? Check. Overrated quarterback with an attitude problem? Check. Arrogant offensive coordinator with only one success in his career? Check. Overpaid for a notoriously lazy defensive lineman? Check. Get the fan base excited about signing a third down back? Check. Sounds like another crappy season in Chicago.

AFC East

New England (11-5)

The Patriots are back to where they prefer, under the radar. And Randy Moss is in a contract year, which means he has the potential for a monster year. After last season’s schedule, this year’s slate looks easier than J-Woww after a couple shots of tequila. As long as Brady can keep his Bieber hair out of his eyes, he’ll have a solid arsenal of receiving weapons. Can the Patriots stop anyone? Maybe not, but they will have the offensive firepower to outscore most teams.

NY Jets (10-6)

The Jets remind me of the Seinfeld episode about “The Race” when George pretends he hasn’t seen Jerry since high school and goes on a rant about the millions he made as an architect. Jerry’s response: “You really built yourself up into something, didn’t you?” And that is extremely applicable to the Jets. They were 9-7 last

year. They brought in a bunch of big name veterans past their prime. They got a break to even get into the playoffs. Is that enough to make them Super Bowl favorites? I don’t think so.

Miami (8-8)

The Dolphins have addressed their biggest need, which was a playmaking wide receiver who could actually, you know, catch. They got Brandon Marshall who when paired with Chad Henne give the Dolphins a very potent offense. Unfortunately they face a deadly stretch of games at GB, Pit, at Cin, at Bal, and Ten. If they go 2-3 during that stretch it would be a heck of a

n accomplishment.

Buffalo (5-11)

The Bills managed to find themselves a dynamic game changer in CJ Spiller, but unfortunately they still have Trent Edwards at QB, a leaky offensive line and a defensive line that can’t slow anyone. Could Spiller be a poor man’s Barry Sanders?

AFC South

Indianapolis (13-3)

Every year you start with Indy at 12 wins and then adjust it up or down a game or two. I ex

pect Peyton to bounce back from his Super Bowl pick-6 and be in F-U mode most of the season. Add to that the embarrassment of weapons he has at his disposal and the Colts will blast through the regular season like Justi

n Timberlake blew through the hottest women in Hollywood before settling on Jessica Biel.

Houston (11-5)

Every year people expect the Texans to break through. Every year they let

everyone down. It’s kind of like sending Lindsay Lohan to rehab – when are we finally going to give up on her putting it all together? Well, I’m giving the Texans one last chance because if they just do the simple things, they have the talent to be successful. They have a great wide receiver in Andre Johnson and a strong defense to go with a QB who is solid in the regular season. That should be enough with their schedule.

Tennessee (7-9)

I have no clue what to expect from this team. Two years ago they went 13-3. Last year they started 0-8 and got blasted 59-0 by the Patriots. Yet they have one of the fastest RBs in the league in Chris Johnson who expects to get 2,500 yards this season. Vince Young and his “Uncle Rico” motion isn’t pretty, but he has been able t

o lead the team to wins. Yet I don’t see this team keeping up with the elite in their division.

Jacksonville (4-12)

Can’t we just move this team to LA and get it over with? No one in Jacksonville would even notice if they were

gone. They might be the most non-descript team in the league with their only star a running back with a knee extremely close to needing a scope that will knock him out for 2-3 weeks at a minimum.

AFC West

San Diego (11-5)

I expected to have this team fall off considerably this year with a rookie bell cow running back and the loss of Vincent Jackson to a hold out. Yet their schedule is so soft, even Norv Turner can lead this team to double-digit wins.

Oakland (9-7)

The Raiders are a lot better than people think. Despite the crazy Al Davis, they have quietly put together a great offseason with the drafting of a game changing linebacker and the trade for a serviceable quarterback in Jas

on Campbell. Campbell relied heavily on his TE, Chris Cooley in Washington, which bodes well for the stats of Zach Miller this season. Look for the Raiders to surprise some people this year and be in the hunt for a playoff spot for most of the year.

Kansas City (8-8)

Thomas Jones will be key to keeping Jamaal Charles fresh, yet the Chiefs still have too many holes defensively to get over the .500 hump.

Denver (6-10)

It now seems pretty obvious that the 6-0 start last year was the aberration. Josh McDaniels put himself in the cross-hairs with his love affair with Tim Tebow, but that is dangerous considering Timmy T is not ready to be the starter. Without Brandon Marshall and with a banged up Knowshon Moreno, the offense will struggle and their defense wasn’t good to begin with.

AFC North

Cincinnati (11-5)

The Bengals boast an attacking defense and a powerful running game. And with the addition of TO, Jermaine Gresham and Jordan Shipley, Carson Palmer has run out of excuses. It’s time for his resurgence like recent pictures of Britney Spears in a bikini and utilize his assets. Despite wearing down at the end of last season, I expect the Bengals to get it done.

Pittsburgh (11-5)

This may have been my biggest surprise. I have them starting 1-3 with Dennis Dixon as the starter but the schedule for the Steelers provides a softer landing for Big Ben than landing on the chest of Salma Hayek. With a recommitment to the run, the Steelers have the ability to slug it out with anyone.

Baltimore (10-6)

I was expecting to have the Ravens in the mix for a Super Bowl birth. Unfortunately, while they improved their offensive weapons with the additions of Anquan Boldin, Donte Stallworth and TJ Houshmandzadeh, their defensive secondary is a mess with the injuries to Ed Reed and Dominique Foxworthy. That does not bode well to compete with the receiving threats in Cincy and games at Atlanta, at Houston and at New England.

AFC Playoff Teams: (1) Colts, (2) Patriots, (3) Chargers, (4) Bengals, (WC) Texans, (WC) Steelers

NFC Playoff Teams: (1) Packers, (2) Saints, (3) Cowboys, (4) 49ers, (WC) Falcons, (WC) Vikings

hAFC Championship: Colts over Patriots

NFC Championship: Packers over Saints

SUPER BOWL CHAMPION: Green Bay Packers over Colts

Maybe I’m just a homer, but I think all the parts are there for Aaron Rodgers to establish his own legacy in Green Bay. My head says the Colts are the pick to beat the Packers, but I can’t put the Packers that close and not have them pull it off.

QUICK HITS for DEGENERATE FRIDAY – Week 1

Thursday pick: Saints (-5) over Vikings

Falcons (-2) over STEELERS – the Matt Ryan rebound begins

Dolphins (-3) over BILLS – Spiller isn’t enough

Lions (+6.5) over BEARS – Misery begins in the Windy City

GIANTS (-6.5) over Panthers – G-men get revenge on Carolina for ruining the closing of old stadium.

PATRIOTS (-4.5) over Bengals – Brady celebrates new contract with big opener

Browns (+3) over BUCCANEERS – who cares?

JAGUARS (-2.5) over Broncos – barely more interesting than the previous suck-fest

Colts (-2) over TEXANS – Texans not quite ready for prime time

Raiders (+6) over TITANS – Raiders may not win but that spread is too big for the resurgent Raiders

Packers (-3) over EAGLES – easiest game to pick this week

49ers (-3) over SEAHAWKS – welcome to the big leagues Coach Carroll

Cardinals (-4) over RAMS – someone has to win this game

Cowboys (-3.5) over REDSKINS – McNabb gets a rude welcome in DC

JETS (-2.5) over Ravens – break in the new stadium in style

CHIEFS (+4) over Chargers – San Diego never starts fast

Weekend Hangover - Love/Hate - Defending Isiah?!?

LOVE

- Knicks fans are up in arms about the return of Isiah Thomas to the front office as a special consultant. Knicks fans have been calling into talk shows and bragging about how they are canceling their season tickets with the return of Thomas, and are quoting George Costanza: “It’s like an onion, the more layers you peel, the more it stinks!” While Thomas does have an impressive track record as the “Bizarro World” King Tut – everything he touches turns into a turd instead of gold – the Indiana Pacers, the CBA, the Knicks and now Florida International U. Yet I actually think there is a value to having Thomas return to the Knicks. During the recruitment of this summer’s free agent class, it was obvious who the biggest winners were – those teams where the owners, presidents, or GMs could flash championship bling at the young players. Riley was able to convince Prince James and Chris Bosh to bring their talents to South Beach. Jerry Reinsdorf and his Jordan-fueled rings were able to get Carlos Boozer and Kyle Korver. And the Lakers were able to add Kevin Martin and resign Derek Fisher based on the recruiting of Kobe and Phil Jackson.

The Knicks were going into the meetings with these free agents with an aging Donnie Walsh (who never won a championship with the Pacers), James Dolan (who has a reputation as a bumbling fool) and Allan Houston (a solid player that couldn’t get a ring with the Knicks). None of those people could inspire today’s young free agents that they know what it takes to win an NBA championship.

Thomas does that. Thomas has credibility with the players because he was an amazing player and he has the hand jewelry to prove that he knows what it takes to win it all. As long as Walsh and Houston control the personnel decisions, the Knicks can benefit from having Isiah as an ambassador for the team when they recruit Carmelo Anthony next summer.

- Loved having football back on television on Sunday night – even if it was pre-season. But the football highlights of the weekend were the Hall of Fame speeches. I didn’t see all of them, but my personal favorite was Emmitt Smith. Emmitt was a trainwreck when ESPN put him on the air with no training, leading to classic comments like being “blowed up” among many other lowlights. So I was ready for the Hall speech to be off the charts in unintentional comedy. Yet the NFL’s all-time leading rusher was tremendous, sounding smooth, confident and emotional. And his thanking of Darryl Johnston was awesome. Well done, Emmitt.

HATE

- Fans who think that because Lance Armstrong raised money for a good cause, he can’t be a cheater and a bad person. Whether or not he took steroids does not take away from his remarkable drive and determination to beat cancer. What it does change is that he cheated to be successful at his sport – just like Barry Bonds, Alex Rodriguez, Roger Clemens, Raphael Palmeiro, Mark McGwire, Jose Conseco and many, many more athletes. Combined with the stories about how he was kind of a prick in his break up with Sheryl Crow, you realize that despite his humanitarian efforts to raise money for cancer research, he has some ugly traits – just like all those other cheaters. Keep them separated – praise him for raising money for a good cause and for being driven enough to recover and inspire others, but be realistic and realize that it is becoming overwhelming evidence that he didn’t win all of those Tour de France races on simple sweat effort.

- What is the deal with the Tampa Bay Rays? They have the second-best record in all of baseball but they seem to put it on cruise control for random games. They have been no-hit twice this year, thrown a no-hitter themselves (Matt Garza) and then they were completely dominated by Brandon Morrow yesterday. Morrow was one out from a perfect game and struck out 17 Rays along the way. So why do the Rays forget to show up every couple weeks and will that be a problem in the playoffs? Probably not, but they have the potential to be less reliable than a story from Jen Sterger about Brett Favre’s texting habits.

- It was a tough weekend for Tigger on the golf course, shooting the worst final round he has ever shot, 77 and finishing in 78^th place at 18 over par. Ouch. I’ll leave it to the gold experts to determine how much of his problems are physical and how much are mental, but there is no doubt that he has completely lost his mojo. Maybe he is simply stressed because Mistress #1, Rachel Uchitel had to check herself into rehab again this weekend.

Degenerate Friday - Bucks Fans as Bad as Philly Fans?

You would think that living on the East Coast for the past 5 years I would be used to insane and clueless fans. Living in Boston, Sully and O’Malley continually solved the Red Sox pitching woes and knew exactly how to get Manny Ramirez to play hard. Living in New York, Vinny from Staten Island and Tony from Queens know more about how to develop a young pitcher like Joba Chamberlain than Joe Girardi, Brian Cashman or the Steinbrenners could ever know. And in both cities I was in close proximity to the most irrational and moronic fans of them all – Philadelphia fans. They have no self-awareness and are the most fair-weather fans I’ve ever seen.

So imagine my surprise when I’m perusing the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel and read an article on Keyon Dooling joining the Bucks and the ways in which he can help Brandon Jennings. A very nice article by Charles Gardner about the 10 year veteran who once was a top ten pick and seems to finally have found his groove in the NBA.

At the end of the article, the first couple of comments from fans almost knocked me out of my chair. Here were the Milwaukee fans, typically a little over-optimistic, but not as cynical or insane as the fans in many other cities, declaring that Kenyon Dooling has nothing to teach Brandon Jennings. Really? Are you serious? There is nothing that Jennings, an offensive dynamo but horrendously bad defender, can learn from a very good on-ball defender who has been around the league for 10 times as many seasons? The fans’ reasons were all based on the fact that Jennings has more talent than Dooling, so there is nothing he can learn.

Did Kobe Bryant learn things from Derek Fisher? Who on the Lakers controls Bryant’s temper, competitiveness and has his ear continually? Fisher. And there is no doubt that Fisher has much less given talent than Kobe. And Kobe’s coach? Phil Jackson was a solid, but not spectacular NBA player, so having less talent than Kobe, I guess he can’t teach him anything……oh wait, they’re positioned to win their second three-peat together.

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In other news, since it is Degenerate Friday…here are the things not to bet on this weekend:

Don’t Bet On:
- Fat Albert Haynesworth passing his conditioning test
- Brett Favre staying out of the headlines for the next week

- Tiger Woods winning the Bridgestone tournament this weekend
- Darrelle Revis being in training camp anytime soon
- ESPN not cramming the Red Sox – Yankees series down our throats when it’s pretty obvious the Red Sox are not going to catch the Yanks or Rays
- Every story you read about Nolan Ryan and his financial backers buying the Texas Rangers will have a picture of Nolan giving a noogie to Robin Ventura.

Brett Favre is NOT Retiring

Haven’t we seen this act before? Brett Favre is supposedly retiring…for the third time (officially the third time – unofficially it is 432,132 times). Like the Rocky movies, they keep making sequels and while the first couple times it was entertaining, at some point it just becomes an old guy who can’t let it go. And that’s where things currently stand. Two years ago he forced a trade to the Jets in July. Last year it was the boy who cried wolf when Favre waited until July to go back and forth before suiting up for the Vikings. This year, no one believes him. Just like if Sylvester Stallone decided to make a final Rocky movie more than 15 years after Rocky V…..wait, that actually happened. And then Stallone made a Rambo IV movie 20 years after Rambo III. Maybe him and Favre are related?

I feel bad for Vikings fans, because now they understand what it is like to have your franchise hi-jacked by Brett Favre, held hostage and potentially left for dead. If Favre stays retired, the Vikings will be lucky to win 8 games with Tavaris Jackson at quarterback. Yet if Favre had told the team back in March or April that he was going to retire, don’t you think the Vikings would have made a major push to get Donovan McNabb? Or at least drafted Jimmy Clausen. Instead, Brett took a big, steaming dump on another franchise who had bent over backwards to please him.

So why don’t I believe Favre is really retired? Simple: Favre is an attention whore, a greedy ego-driven diva and the king of excuses.

Attention Whore
He loves the attention from the media and the fans. He likes to be the center of all the storylines and loves to pose for the cameras more than Paris Hilton. He loves the specials about whether he will or won’t retire. He wants the reporters camped out at the end of his driveway so he can put on his old Wrangler jeans, beat up baseball hat, and smirk into the camera “Aw, shucks. I just play football.” Yeah right, Brett. You just love everyone begging you to play and using your “power” to get Coach Childress to pick you up from the airport himself. He also knows that Vikings fans will drop a deuce in their pants when they realize how bad the Vikings will be without him, and therefore they will love him even more when he rides in on his white horse just before the start of the regular season. And he will love the slobbering that ESPN will lavish on him from Chris Berman, Chris Mortensen (Favre might as well pay him as his personal PR person) and Sal Paolotonio.

Greedy Ego-Driven Diva
There is no doubt that a part of Brett’s ploy is to get more than the $13 million currently on his contract. He sees the enormous contract Sam Bradford signed. He sees that Peyton Manning and Tom Brady are about to break the bank. And he wants his piece of the pie. So he’s going to put the pressure on the Vikings to add another year and a few million more in his contract. He doesn’t need the money. He already has enough to buy most of Mississippi. But Brett sees it as a sign of respect to be paid among the elite quarterbacks in the league and he needs the attention and what he believes is his due respect.

Yet this is the same Brett Favre that called out Sterling Sharpe and Javon Walker when they held out because they had outplayed their current contract. No wants to talk about that. Yet what Favre is doing is basically holding out for more money and to avoid training camp. Way to be a team player, Brett.

King of Excuses
Favre’s toughness cannot be questioned. Yet every time he fails, there is always an excuse as to why it’s not Brett’s fault. When the Packers struggled from 2005-2006 it was always blamed on a poor supporting cast. Yet the reality is that Favre was out of shape, unprepared and undisciplined and as a result he threw a ton of interceptions. It would not have mattered who was lining up wide for him. When he cost the Packers the 2007-08 NFC Championship with a hideous game, it was because of the cold. It couldn’t have been because he locked on to a receiver and threw a horrendous interception, could it? When he faded terribly down the stretch with the Jets in 2008-09, it was because of a torn biceps tendon. And when he threw another unconscionable interception that cost the Vikings a trip to the Super Bowl in 2009-10, what was the excuse? Oh yeah, it was his ankle injury, not his terrible decision-making.

So by announcing his retirement because his ankle hasn’t healed correctly, he is creating his built-in excuse in case he fails with the Vikings when he makes his way back to the team during the preseason. If the Vikings don’t get to or win the Super Bowl, it won’t be Brett’s poor decision-making or deteriorating skills that are the problem. It will be the ankle that didn’t allow him to play at full strength and he was a hero just for trying to gut it out.

Listen, I loved watching Favre play when I was growing up, and I consider myself extremely lucky to have had one of the greatest quarterbacks of all time leading my favorite team throughout all of my formative years. But enough is enough. Unfortunately his amazing playing ability has been eclipsed by his pathetic ego-driven diva act.

Getcha Popcorn Ready!

With camps getting started all over the NFL, it’s time to turn more and more of our attention to Lord Football. And I will not be wasting any space on whether or not the league’s biggest diva will or won’t play (we all know he’s coming back, but not until he plants enough doubt with his personal mouthpiece, Chris Mortensen of ESPN, so that in case he fails, he has some built in excuses). What other stories are of interest? Dez Bryant refusing to carry Roy Williams’ pads and then backing off because he “didn’t know it was a tradition” with the Cowboys? More boring than the drama surrounding The Bachelorette, Ali. And as Tim Cowlishaw of the Dallas Morning News perfectly pointed out – if that’s the ‘Boys big problem, they are going to have a great season. Instead, we learned today that Terrell Owens had signed on to play with the Bengals this season. Well, Cincy – Getcha Popcorn Ready!!

I may be as crazy as the Timberwolves GM, but I actually think this could work very, very well for the Bengals. If Owens can keep his ego in check, he has a chance to put up really good numbers on a team that has the potential to be a factor in the playoffs. Here are the reasons it will not implode:

1 – Carson Palmer
No quarterback in the league has dealt with more “entertainers” at the wide receiver position than Palmer. His main target has been the always-entertaining Chad Ochocinco, and previously he was teamed up with the always-outspoken T.J. Houshmandzadeh. Palmer is as well-prepared as any quarterback in the league to block out egos and just try to make plays. While his numbers were very pedestrian as he came back from missing most of 2008 with an arm injury, he remains a cerebral quarterback and if his arm strength returns, he could be the comeback player of the year.

2 – The Fit
Owens is not nearly as fast as he once was, and he does not have the most reliable hands in the league, but he has the potential to find quite a few openings with Ochocinco stretching the field and rookie TE Jermaine Gresham attracting the attention of linebackers or safeties. It has the potential to fit the same way Katy Perry fits in a bikini – snug and very flattering.

3 – Owens’ Maturity
Has T.O. really matured? It’s hard to say, but despite his previous track record of being an enormous headache, he was very tame last season. Despite playing for a horrendous Bills team with quarterbacks that were more useless than Carrie Underwood in a Chelsea bar, Owens did not ruffle feathers. He posted his weakest season totals since he was a rookie, yet he was almost a model citizen. Has he realized that winning is more important than his diva act? Perhaps. Or was it just but on the back burner until he had the proper spotlight to promote himself? I want to believe that he will be entertaining, yet will play hard and not be a locker room cancer.

4 – The Competition
The AFC North should be extremely compelling this season, with Baltimore, Cincinnati and Pittsburgh all eyeing the division title. Yet the Ravens are dealing with a banged up secondary – particularly Ed Reed. The Steelers could find themselves in a hole early without Big Ben under center, and their defense was not as strong in 2009 as typical Pittsburgh defenses. Add that to the very young secondary in Cleveland and the Bengals look to have a very good chance to improve upon their poor 26th ranked passing offense.

Owens will no doubt form the most entertaining wide receiver combo with Chad Ochocinco, and when you add Antonio Bryant to the mix (whatever short time he is healthy), the Bengals could have a very potent passing offense that could help to balance the Cedric Benson-led running game. That could make the Bengals very dangerous, so you better getcha popcorn ready.

Weekend Hangover - Love/Hate

LOVE

- Training Camp starts!! As much as I enjoy baseball, the boys of summer cannot compete with the grid iron in the fall. As camps start, there will be a ton of talk about position battles, who wants a new contract, what rookie is picking up the game quickly (once the rookies other than Dez Bryant finally start signing), and what aging veteran looks like he ran out of gas. Predictions will be made based on last season and hopes of a new season, and then finally in another month, real games will start to be played. And this morning the month-long heat and humidity in New York finally broke and the air had just the slightest chill to it…..almost like mother nature even decided to give a little head nod to football.

- The intriguing contract situation between Tom Brady and the Patriots. The Pats have always been ruthless in dealing with aging veterans, allowing players to walk or trading them instead of paying them large contracts. And yet, Brady has been the face of the franchise for the past decade and has been a great company man, taking below-market contracts to allow the team more flexibility to sign other players around him. Well, coming off some injuries and being likely in the second half of his career, Tommy had his Don Draper realization (great episode of Mad Men last night) that it’s time to own who he is and take what is rightfully his. There is almost no chance that Brady will hold out or cause any ripples because the guy loves to play football, but it will be interesting to see how the team handles the situation. Also keeping a close eye on the contract will be Peyton Manning, who can take the Brady contract to the Colts and say “This plus 10% is our starting point” next season.

- Loved seeing Andre Dawson get inducted to the Hall of Fame. The Hawk was among my favorite players growing up. Growing up a Brewers fan when the Brewers were in the AL, it made it okay to be a Cubs fan in the NL. And with almost every Cubs game on WGN – most during the day – it was easy to root for guys like Dawson, Ryne Sandberg, Shawon Dunston and Lee Smith, even if they never did win. Dawson went in as an Expo, which is a good thing considering there are no other Expos in the Hall of Fame and with the franchise moved, there likely will never be another.

HATE

- Talk about the looming lockout in the NFL. We get it. The owners want lower salaries for the players. The players don’t. Of course they’re going to argue over it and threaten to have no football next season. In the end, they’ll work it out because both sides know their meal tickets get punched when the games are played on the field. Even if there is a lockout, we’ll survive. College football will still be there, and hell half the players in college are getting paid more than the league minimum anyway, so it’s barely even amateur sports.

- The Angels pretty much stole Dan Haren from the Diamondbacks, and it does not start the baseball trading season with a bang. The Angels are still 6 games behind Texas in the AL West and even with Haren are unlikely to make up the ground on the strong-pitching Rangers. Yet it was still a good trade for them, not giving up many prospects and trading a middle of the rotation guy for Haren who has the stuff to be a top of the rotation guy. The Diamondbacks just pulled a Betty Draper and managed to find a replacement, but one not nearly as interesting as the stud they originally were working with.